These people suspended in time allow much thought and wondering.
In the early morning,
the world is still.
A gust of wind shakes a leaf,
and the gathered dewdrops rain on the ladybird
hiding in the shade.
The crows exchange their daily greetings
as they tear into the rotting flesh of a rabbit.
By the field of flowers,
a newly-hatched butterfly flies from daisy to daisy,
anxious to live, to taste, to touch
before its week of life runs out.
The world is still as ever,
and the day would age and depart as it always did–
these are not tears, just
the complaints of a heart that
waits on empty dreams.
My days are empty,
only set apart by the succession of
light and dark.
The hours tick by and I am still fasting,
abstaining from words that my mouth
itches to speak.
There’s a furled ball of stillborn words
that have been gathering in my throat,
blocking air and restricting my chest.
I am no longer a leaf travelling
as far as the wind could take me–no.
Somewhere along the way, I became
one out of many that are
held tightly by the branches of this
deeply rooted tree.
Every spring you bloom
like a thorn in Apollo’s
heart–his love remains.
My smiles are cheap, as cheap as they come.
Don’t let me fool you anymore; there’s a lot of ice
you’d need to melt
before I believe you when you tell me
you love me.
Note: I wanted to write more but left it at that. I might end up editing this some time. Or maybe not.
You think I’ve become cynical;
I just think you should
lay off the pink-tinted shades you hide behind.
He and I,
we’re sitting side by side on a Sunday night,
watching mindless TV.
He puts his arm around my back,
his hand playing with the ends of my hair carelessly,
as I put my head on his shoulder.
We don’t say a word.
The audience in the show laughs
and I feel his chest shake under my hand.
My mind starts to wander
while I think of puzzle pieces and the two faces of a coin
before I have an epiphany:
I can’t tell anymore
where he starts and I end.
I’ve known those paths on your arms,
the familiar roads intersecting on your stomach
as long as I’ve known you.
I didn’t like looking at your eyes,
I didn’t like seeing the pitiful smile you put on.
I don’t understand this.
I don’t understand.
I didn’t think I’d ever understand
the pain of birthing those scars.
I thought I’d never see you again,
but you must be here
to witness the birth of my own scars.
I’ve been standing on the edge of a cliff for a short while or a long time (what does time mean in such a place?), one foot hanging in the air precariously, perhaps in hopes of provoking death’s endless patience with it.
I’ve peered down that black abyss once, when I’d truly felt agitated and desperate enough to stop fighting against its magnetic pull. And the sight of that still nothingness that could swallow me into absence soothed me.
Now it just beguiles me further, charming my eyes blind, calling out for me. I could hear it in my heart, calling for me.
I’m not strong enough to resist.